PAPAZOO

Empty Seat:

A Denver Broncos fan was enjoying himself at the game in a packed Mile High Stadium, until he noticed an empty seat down in front. He went down and asked the guy next to it if he knew whose seat it was.

The guy said, “Yes, that’s my wife’s seat. We have never missed a game since the Craig Morton days, but now my wife is dead.”

The fan offered his sympathy and said it was really too bad that he couldn’t find some relative to give the ticket to and enjoy the game together.

“Oh no.” the guy said. “They’re all at the funeral.”

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Yo mama is so old, I told her to act her own age, and she died.

Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
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A blonde walked into a shoe shop and saw a pair of shoes made from alligator skin that she liked. “How much for these shoes?” she asked the store manager.

“$200″, he replied.

“That’s too expensive! Can’t you bring the price down?”

The store manager said he couldn’t, and got irritated when the blond persisted.

Finally after arguing with her for awhile he said, “There’s a pond with alligators behind the store! Why don’t you kill an alligator and get your alligator shoes for free?!” he yelled.

“Fine I will,” the blonde replied.

After an hour, the manager got a bit worried and decided to go out and check on her.

When he arrived at the pond, he saw the blonde lugging a dead alligator and flinging it on the ground next to 6 other dead ones.

Before he could ask what she was doing, she wailed “Oh my gosh! This one is NOT wearing shoes either!”

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3 friends die in a car accident and they go to an orientation in heaven. They are all asked, “When you are in your casket and friends and family are talking about you, what would you like them to say?

The first guy says,”I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man.”

The second guy says, “I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow.”

The last guy replies, “I would like to hear them say … Look, He’s Moving!

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A couple had two little boys, ages 8 and 10, who were excessively mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew that, if any mischief occurred in their town, their sons were probably involved.
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